//SHARING// It's so complicated. Think about it. There's different rules for sharing, depending on what you're playing with, who you're playing with, where you are, etc. Can you blame toddlers for not having a genuine understanding of sharing -- or for testing the boundaries of whether or not *now* is a good time to share?
"How do I know it's my turn?"
"Do I just sit here and wait?"
"Can I have it now?"
"Do I just take it?"
I have always felt that forced sharing actually teaches some of the wrong lessons, such as:
Crying loudly will help a child get what they want.
Parents are in charge of who gets what and when they get it.
Children should always interrupt what they are doing to give something to another child just because the other child asks.
These are not the messages we intend to provide our children, but unfortunately, when forced to share, this is often what children may take in. Instead, teach your kids to speak up for themselves by teaching kids to use their words, advocate for themselves, and work things out with other children!!! All of which, are very important life skills. Children do not need to be told when their time is up and do not need to immediately share their toys with others. If adults are always jumping in or setting limits, children lose the ability to learn from the experience. Children need to learn how to speak up for themselves in a kind and respectful way.
My favorite suggestion of all, when teaching children to share, is actually not sharing at all! I always recommend "taking turns", and encourage them to do so by saying: "So-N-So is playing with that right now, he seems to be trying to say that he isn't done yet, what can you play with while you are waiting?" Play is not a break from learning. Play IS learning!!! ❤️
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